You're the asshole, asshole!
The news came quickly and with a stunning blow today when it was announced that soft drink giant,Pepsi, had lost its widely public, 25 year, battle with Coke.
More news as it comes. For now we have these comments from members of the soft drinks support group “The Pepsi Challenge”:
“Pepsi was obsessed coke . always relating itself to it. Almost as if one could not exist without the other, or so Pepsi made it seem.”
“Everybody knows about it. its nothing private. You can’t talk about Pepsi without mentioning Coke. It was serious.”
Wasting time at work, burning down the clock.
No one around to stop me, No need to check the stock.
I dig so deep everyday, looking for gold
I give it all i got for a pretty wage, I’m told
But for now, with no immediate drive, I gonna let me duties subside.
I’m wasting time at work, without a damn for the bottom line.
If someone came and found me, it would surely be the end
but for right now, I’m fine and soon enough it will be break time.
My job, Don’t care much for my needs
My body, would rather be healed and freed
My boss, well he really aint no differernt than me
But for the moment, I am wasting company time
The Bossman, He may be of my kind
Living out his prime in search of meager dimes
But he don’t understand time, He finds it comparable to money and supply
And that’s just a common lie. (Thats just an outright lie.)
Money aint worth your time, unless you find yourself in a bind
So for the moment and most of your life, lets waste a little time.
It’s Alright, The Bossman does it all the time.
WEDNESDAYS AT THE BEAUTY BAR IN HOLLYWOOD FROM 10 TILL THE END!!!
This is a video of Grant Morrison at the 2000 Disinfo. Grant is the comic book writer of the past 20 years. Here he talks about the power of symbols and what they can do for you. What else are you doing? take some time and expand the mind. Facebook will be there when you get back, if you come back at all.
August 19th, 2009 The RuCu Weekly Edition of This Doesn’t Suck
The most downloaded video on the internet (take that Funny or Die.com). What are you missing out on?
Take the red pill grow small… Zeitgeist
Take the blue pill grow large… Zeitgeist: Addendum
Please post all fearful, reactionary thoughts and have a nice day.
Fuck the Critics They Dont Mean a Thing
What’s you favorite way to handle a heckler? Let us know… Comment page.
Senate approves 96-4 vote to communicate only in broken, ambiguous forms of English, Double speak, and grunts.
August 7th, 2009
By Ingrid Locke
In a quick and almost unanimous vote, the U.S. Senate decided today to change the official language of the U.S. Senate from English to what is being referred to by senators and media organizations as “patriotic gibberish”. The senate vote is one of the fastest votes ever held in the Capitol building, lasting a total of 2 minutes and 14 seconds. Senate Majority leader, Harry Reid (D-Nevada) issued a statement in which he called the vote, “systematically composed and goo-great fun time.” The change in language comes on the eve of a major national healthcare overhaul, which is expected to rely heavily on the new “patriotic gibberish.”
“The American group of people should be happy face that democracy functions at optimist levels and secured assets of historical legitimization.” rambled Illinois Senator, Dick Durbin before adding, “I’m as moondanced as hot apple pie.”
The four senators to vote against the bill include the three obviously confused ‘blue dog’ democrats, and Massachusetts Senator, John Kerry, who has not showed to a senate vote since running for president in 2004.
Comments made by other senators, especially republicans who fronted the bill, have been extremely positive, or at least sounded positive. News organizations are still unable to understand many of the words and sounds made by senators.
The government is expected to release a dictionary of the words utilized in ‘patriotic gibberish’ sometime next week. Spokespeople for the senate have said the American public should expected to find many words they are used to in political discourse such as, ‘fear’, ‘national security’, “gerrymandering’, ‘bi-partisanship’, and ‘transparency’. Words axed from the political vocabulary include, ‘privacy’, ‘truth’, ‘critical discussion’, ‘constitution’ and ‘tolerance’.
The reasons for the change in language is said to be one of “bureaucratic effectiveness” and has many senators promising greater communication and connection between Senators and the suckers who actually listen to what they say. One media scholar at the Mediocre American Institute (MAI) has hailed the vote as “a huge step in connecting a divided America.” Director of the program, Alan Herpton, was quoted in an interview with the Today Show where he said the change in language, “was a long time coming. The American public and government has been speaking ‘patriotic gibberish’ unofficially for a very long time. This is more of a formality than anything.”
What’s your favorite “Patriotic Gibberish” phrase? Let us Know….
Ambehul Elementary School Elections 2009
1st Grade Class President
“If I were King I wood make the world a bedder place. I wood get a survey for world peace. I wood make it a law to recycle. I think it wood be a good ideeya to make different money. I wood put hidden cameras on the street. I would lower taxes. That’s the reason to vote for me!”
King Adam